Stand up for yourself: Embracing Humour as a speaker

John: 00:00:00

Welcome to the show, and today I want to do something a little

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different bringing you the solo

show on Wednesday instead of Friday.

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I will get that schedule fixed

back to normal pretty soon.

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But one of the reasons for doing that

is the next episode is gonna be episode

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200, and that is going to be an interview

with an incredible guest called Chris Ma.

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I'm bringing you that on Friday.

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But I wanted today to follow on

from my episode with Judy Carter and

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give you some news about something

that episode inspired me to do.

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So I hope you'll stay with me to hear a

little bit more about adding humor into

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your presentations and maybe even having

a go at standup comedy while perhaps

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why we should all do that as speakers.

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So welcome to present influence the show

for speakers, coaches and consultants who

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want to influence, impact, and inspire.

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My name's John Ball, your guide on this

journey to mastery level communication.

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As we get things started off on the show

today, I hope you have checked out the

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episode with Judy Carter from last time.

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Judy shared some real gems, and

Judy is someone who I'd wanted to

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interview for a very long time.

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She's one of the only people,

who is an excellent comedy coach

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who can help you to be funnier.

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But one thing that Judy to say is.

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She can't make unfunny people funny.

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However, there is maybe a little

get around that sometimes even just

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by acknowledging that you are humor

impaired, you can get that laugh if you

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struggle to be funny in other things.

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So you can still have a little, there's

always ways to add a little humor, even if

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you're not a natural comedian or humorist

or joker within your presentations,

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it's still good to have that.

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Do Judy's thing of changing your

response from a negative to a positive.

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Hey, I'm humor impaired.

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It turns things around and you can get

those although I would say that response

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does require a little bit of work or

practice that may not feel for you.

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Even deadpan.

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I think that would work.

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Now, one of the things that Judy

did say is that she herself was

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doing a standup comedy night.

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In fact, she was paying to be on an

open mic so she could scare herself, so

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she could have the experience of being

up, telling some jokes and doing some

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material in front of a live audience.

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And stage time is always such an important

element of keeping ourselves going.

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Now I have for a little while been aware

of that a new open mic Comedy Night in

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English in the city of Valencia where

I live and have been a little tentative

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about putting myself forward for it.

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One element has been the time to

actually do the prep work for this,

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and that's still a concern for me.

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However, I do have.

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Overall book's worth of comedy

material that I've been writing

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over several years based on exer.

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A lot of it's based on exercises that

I've done with Judy Carter through the

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new Comedy Bible and the workbook that

she has alongside that has been incredibly

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helpful for me, and having been going

over some of that material and knowing

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that I now need to come up with a five

minute set for April the third then.

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I'm happy to say that some of that

stuff is still making me laugh.

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I have no idea how that's gonna go,

I was saying to a friend today that

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I'm happy to get up on stage and talk,

and I can be funny when I do that.

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And a good friend of mine was

saying to me, she's always found

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my talks and presentations to

be entertaining and humorous.

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So that's certainly a good start.

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But the whole concept of getting

on a stage with the sole intention

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of making people laugh is scary.

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And I decided to put myself forward

for this open mic night is only

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gonna be five minutes and if I can,

I'm gonna record it so that I can

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share it with you on the podcast.

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Now, some of the things that I think

are particularly important, and one

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thing I think is really good to do is

to set the tone straight away, which

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is something I'm gonna do, set the tone

straight away of who I am what I'm about.

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So one of the first things I'm

gonna say is, Hey, I'm gonna

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address the elephant in the room.

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And then I'll say something like,

Hey, I'm not talking about myself.

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I'm not an elephant.

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Oh, okay.

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Maybe I'm have a few extra pounds, but

that can actually lead me into some

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material that I already have written.

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So it starts gonna be something, I

think, something along those lines

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clearly needs a little bit of practice.

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And of course I'm delivering it

deadpan here, so it's not gonna

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be how it would be on a stage.

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But I'm happy to say things like thinking

about different aspects of your life

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as stories particularly were very Well.

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Most comedy these days is stories,

people telling stories that are humorous

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or have humorous elements in them.

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And one thing I got from the workshop

that I did with Judy Carter several

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months ago was we worked on a story

that I'm gonna bring into my five

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minute set that's just based on

something as simple as going swimming.

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So this is where the, me talking

about being a bit overweight

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is gonna lead me into that.

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I'm now going swimming every

day as part of my mission, to

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combat my size, and to slim down.

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And that leads me into then the, some

of the funny, hopefully funny story

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that we, that I worked on with Judy,

which is gonna require a little bit

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more, a little bit more work as well.

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Some of the things that I do think work

very well though within comedy sets

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are rants to talk about things that

you really hate and why you hate them.

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I think also things that you don't really

understand, or maybe you do understand

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them, but you don't understand why people

respond in certain ways or why they do.

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Why do people do some of the

crazy things that they do?

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Done in the right way.

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That can work.

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Observational humor can be really good.

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I would have to say one of the best

comedians I've ever seen observational

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humor, although she's in the doghouse

these days, is Ellen DeGeneres is

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she had her standup certainly from

way back was excellent observational

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comedy, Victoria Wood, and from the uk.

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Another great example probably someone

that anyone outside of the UK may not

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really know or have come across or

any of our, any younger UK listeners.

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May not necessarily be aware of her

either, but observations are done the

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right way and they're like, what the hell?

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You want to look at what those

strange responses are that people

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have and your reactions to that

as well done in the right way.

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That can be funny.

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So I'm gonna let you know how that goes.

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But it's important, I think , and

something I'm gonna do is try out my

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material before I get onto that stage.

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So it's not going to be just me delivering

that for the first time to anyone else.

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I wanna see if that material

can make someone laugh before

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I do an open mic night.

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I'm not a professional comedian

although, something I would love to

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do is even though that's terrifying,

it's something I would love to do.

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And I would love to be good at it.

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So I'm hoping I can make people

laugh at least a little bit

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in five minutes on stage.

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And I want to share that as terrifying

as it is with you, and encourage

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you as well to think about the

ways in which you could be funny.

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If you are wanting to punch up your

presentations a little bit and being funny

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could be a good way for you to do that,

and I think it is a great way to do that.

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Do grab yourself a copy of Judy Carter's

new Comedy Bible, because I think it is

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the only book that I've come across that

effectively teaches you how to construct

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standup comedy routines and put yourself

into the mindset of creating the material.

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So Judy does a great job of leading you

into comic ways of thinking, flexing your

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comedy muscles in your brain so that you

start thinking in those sorts of ways.

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We want things like those power of

three effects, where we'll have a

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one and a two, and then a surprise.

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So you get one thing normal,

second thing normal, and the third

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thing completely off the wall.

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A bit of a, what the heck?

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Those are the kinds of things

that do make people laugh.

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Interestingly enough, before I'd

even made this decision, I have

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also been listening to a book on

understanding humor and comedy.

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Which has been really fascinating

and there are certainly some great

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tips in there as well for comedy

writing and for comedy performing.

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And I think one of the most important

things is that comedy isn't necessarily

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always about punching up or punching down,

or it's not always about insulting people.

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Sometimes comedy is about creating

a sense of danger and then

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giving the relief of that danger.

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So we had, oh, where's

it gonna go with this?

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And then it was like, oh, sigh of relief.

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We can laugh about that now as well.

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So comedy can be many different

things, but it doesn't mean that

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we always have to be political.

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We don't always have to be an

attack on somebody or we don't

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have to make other people.

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Into the punchline of our jokes, but

if we are gonna do that, we should

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probably try and do it in a warm way.

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And I think this is something

that I sometimes I watch a lot of

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standup because it is something that

fascinates me and it is something I

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would like to be able to be good at.

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And when I see comedians doing crowd

work, especially comedians, like Jessica

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Kirson and Mateo, lane another one.

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Excellent.

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With crowd work, and there's another

guy whose name I can't remember.

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He's very good at crowd work.

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And when I see these, they can throw out

sometimes a harsh word or an insult, but

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then they'll smile and they'll make it.

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Okay.

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And that makes me think about.

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Back when I used to be a flight

attendant, and I remember years and

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years ago, a senior crew member saying

to me, Hey, look, you can pretty much

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say anything you want to say with a

smile on your face to a passenger.

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Now, short of actually swearing at them

or calling them something very offensive.

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You can mostly say anything you

want with a smile on your face.

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And I found over the years, my experience.

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Proved that pretty much was the case.

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Not that I was trying to be

intentionally mean or nasty to people.

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I just sometimes find when you had to give

some feedback on the spot or maybe make

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a comment in a situation that you could

get away with something a little cheeky if

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you had a smile on your face, and it does

need to be that warm smile rather than a

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smug grade or something, someone might

want to slap you or punch you instead.

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So I think no warm smile on your face, the

one where your eyes are smiling as well.

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It shows that there's no hostility,

and I think this is one of the

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reasons why comedy does help to

engender trust in a relationship with

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an audience, particularly, because

it's disarming to that degree.

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It shows not a threat.

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'cause I'm making you

laugh and I come in peace.

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It's like I might be cheeky,

but I'm not gonna hurt you.

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I'm not going to upset you.

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I'm not going to damage you

or your reputation in any way.

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I might make some jokes, but

it's all gonna be lighthearted.

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And it's not gonna be deeply personal

'cause we're not looking to upset anyone.

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That's not the goal of comedy.

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But when we can do comedy

well, we can potentially have

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a theater or an auditorium of

people laughing at the same time.

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Okay.

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Maybe not.

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Everyone, a hundred percent is always

gonna be laughing at every joke.

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But it tends to be the case that when a

lot of people start laughing, other people

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start to join in as well because laughter

is like a group activity that we'll do and

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it does start to much like storytelling,

comedy does start to synchronize our

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brainwaves when we're laughing together.

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It helps to make groups more cohesive.

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We feel like we can almost trust

people if we are laughing about the

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same things as they are and we're

finding the same things funny.

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We find our tribe, as Judy was

saying, we find the people who will

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throw the ball back to us and not get

upset or think, Hey, you are weird.

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I would love to hear from you, as to

whether you are adding some humor into

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your presentations or whether you are

gonna try and be a little funnier, whether

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you are actually gonna grab yourself

a copy of the Comedy Bible, and maybe

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even the workbook, and have a go at

being funny, creating, at least writing

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some humorous material for yourself.

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And if you do.

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Please feel free to share it.

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You can by all means, you can join Judy's

Comedy Bible, Facebook group and share

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stuff there and connect with other people,

many of whom are actually trying to

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become full-time professional comedians.

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But you could also, if you're brave,

share it here and maybe if you

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are open to it, we could actually

have a show where we take a look

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at some of the things that you do.

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I would love to add any, anything I

get back from you into the episode

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that I'm gonna do where I'm gonna

try and bring you a recording

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of my attempt at standup humor.

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I'll share this as well before

I start to wrap up for today,

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but I'm also gonna potentially

be in a story slam this Sunday.

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I definitely feel it is time to do

something about my stage time, because

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it's been a long time since I've been

to a Toast Master group and most of

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my presentation work recently has been

virtual, so I really want to do some in

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person speaking and presenting, get up

on those stages and try out my skills.

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So not only do I have to prepare a

five minute story for this Sunday,

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but also keep working on my five

minute set, which is exactly what I'm

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going to work on once I've finished

recording this particular episode.

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So if you're not interested in hearing me

talk about any of my podcast experience

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to come up to 200 episodes, this might

be a good place to leave the episode.

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But for those of you who are interested

in that, I'd love to share a little

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of some of my insights with you.

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This show has been through

numerous iterations over the years.

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There's several name changes.

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It started off being called the

Loqui Podcast or Lokey Loca Speaking.

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Nobody got that.

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They thought it was like lokey, the

God of mischief or something like that.

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There was a crazy name.

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I changed it to, I think,

speaking of influence.

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Then it just became speaking influence.

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I think, I can't even remember what I was

calling it last year or a few years ago

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before I changed it to present influence,

which was also my business name.

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It just made so much sense when it's

like, all right, this is actually

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what the show's about, and I have the

business operating name or present

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influence because it's about presenting

and it's about influence, but it's

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also about being present, and I wanted

the show to reflect that as well.

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So it is been a lot more cohesive.

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We did have a bit of a tone where I was

trying to take the show to being more

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about podcasts and podcast guesting.

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However, it just seemed, it felt

like it limited the scope of what I

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wanted to talk about way too much.

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And really, I wanted the show to be about.

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Influence, about persuasion, about

presentation skills, the kinda stuff

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that's gonna help us all, myself

included, to become better communicators.

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So that's one reason why I want

to keep bringing experts on who

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can talk about interesting aspects

that help us to grow and develop.

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In our communication and influence

and persuasion skills within ethical

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frameworks and to perhaps sometimes

understand some of these stuff that

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maybe isn't so ethical so that we can

at least have awareness of that, but

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hopefully not practice that for ourselves.

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The show did have a bit of a hiatus last

year whilst I was working with the Speaker

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lab organization and things got very

busy there and I just really couldn't

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keep up with the workload paying someone

else to edit and take care of the show,

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to have that done at the quality that

I wanted was a bit beyond my budget.

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It was really a case of I still needed to

find the time to do that rather than to

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get some cheapy editing from fiverr.com

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or something like that.

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It felt better to maybe pause

the show and I wasn't really

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sure it was gonna come back.

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I would say, honestly, just being

honest with you, I probably lost a

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bit of passion for it for a while.

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And it was really hard to get that back.

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But I knew I wanted to and I worked on it

and I talked about it with various people

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and then I started putting the show back

together and looking at some new guest

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interviews and decided, Hey, yeah, this

is something that I really want to do.

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I'm happy to report that the show

listener numbers are gradually increasing.

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It's all going in the right direction.

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People do seem to be liking the mixture

of guest interviews and solo shows as

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well, so I'm gonna keep those coming and

take your pick as to which you prefer.

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If there are any other formats that you

would like to see or any other ideas you

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have for the show, or maybe you even think

you'd like to be, come and be a guest or

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even a guest host then please let me know.

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I'd love, I would love to hear from you.

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Certainly the show is going to continue

and now that I'm particularly growing my

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speaking business and my coaching elements

with that as well it really is all

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gonna be very tied into what we do here.

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So you're gonna get a lot of

elements that I coach and work with

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people on within these episodes.

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But of course, if you wanna wait

to get all that piecemeal over

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episodes over several years, then

you know, very welcome to do that.

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But if you do want to accelerate

things and maybe then develop a keynote

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for us to work on your humor, get

presentation feedback and guidance,

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that's gonna take you to a new level,

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we could have a chat sooner than that.

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You can.

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Just reach out to me,

John@presentinfluence.com

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or connect with me on LinkedIn.

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: 00:16:27

You'll find my LinkedIn profile link

within the show notes to the episode.

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: 00:16:32

But that's pretty much

it for me for this week.

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: 00:16:34

And so the next episode is

gonna be my 200th episode.

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I'm gonna be bringing you that originally

was gonna be the episode with Judy but

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: 00:16:41

it's now gonna be a wonderful interview

that I did with a guy called Chris Marr,

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: 00:16:45

who is the author of the Authoritative

Coach, which I do have trouble saying.

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: 00:16:50

Great book.

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: 00:16:51

And if you want to check out really what

I would call the first part of this where

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: 00:16:55

we talked about the coaching elements,

if you are a coach and you are interested

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: 00:16:59

in being a more authoritative coach.

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: 00:17:02

Go and listen to the coaching

clinic episode with Chris, where

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: 00:17:06

myself and Angie had a chat.

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: 00:17:07

We talked much more about the

coaching elements there on this

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: 00:17:11

episode, which is gonna be the follow

up to that, which I did solo with

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: 00:17:14

Chris for this particular podcast.

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: 00:17:17

We talk much more about the authority

elements of that and how that's gonna

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: 00:17:21

help you as a speaker, consultant coach.

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: 00:17:24

So whilst there may be a little

crossover between those, it is

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: 00:17:28

a very different conversation.

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: 00:17:30

Very worthwhile as well.

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: 00:17:31

So I hope you will join us for that

episode 200 coming out this Friday.

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: 00:17:37

You'll also get the newsletter on Friday.

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: 00:17:39

I will return to the Wednesday

format, but if you're not currently

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: 00:17:43

getting the newsletter at the

moment, it's only on LinkedIn.

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: 00:17:46

I will be trying to make it available.

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: 00:17:47

On Kit as well.

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: 00:17:48

So for anyone who wants to sign up

and get it straight to their email

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: 00:17:51

inbox without following another

LinkedIn newsletter we'll make that

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: 00:17:55

available for you as well pretty soon.

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: 00:17:57

But right now it's just on LinkedIn.

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: 00:17:58

Certainly looking to get

more followers there.

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: 00:18:01

I'm aiming to hit 1000 followers

on LinkedIn for the newsletter.

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: 00:18:04

If you do check that out and sign up for

it, please do share it with your network

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: 00:18:08

as well so that we can hit that 1000

follower goal for the newsletter too.

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: 00:18:14

For now, wherever you're going,

wherever you're doing, have an

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amazing rest of your day and I'll

see you next time for episode 200.