Commitment & Consistency: High Value Strategies for Speakers

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Why is it that small yeses from your audience can lead to bigger outcomes?

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Why do people stick to decisions

even when they're no longer ideal?

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Maybe even shown to be wrong.

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It's all down to one of the most

powerful drivers of behavior, which

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is commitment and consistency.

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One more principle from Dr.

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Robert Cialdini's Influence Framework.

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And if you haven't already been

watching this whole series of episodes

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on Cialdini's principles as they

relate to speakers, then you're

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welcome to go back and start from the

beginning or start from this episode

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and go and catch up on the others.

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Later.

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We are diving into how speakers can

ethically apply this principle to

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build trust, reinforce decisions, and

boost conversions without using pushy

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tactics or strong arm manipulation.

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Now, whether you're speaking on keynotes,

webinars, workshops, or whatever it is,

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this is your secret weapon to helping

your audience say yes and mean it.

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So what do commitment and

consistency really mean?

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Well, commitment means taking

a stance verbally in writing

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or through small actions.

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Making some small dedication, commitment,

and consistency then relates to this in

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the human desire to behave in ways that

match our past decisions and our identity.

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We want to be seen and we

want to see ourselves as

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reliable, as congruent people.

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And we also want to see

that in others as well.

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So it's important as speakers that we

are congruent and reliable as well,

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and not doing so can damage trust.

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Chaldini found that people who made

small active and public commitments

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were far more likely to follow through.

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So as a speaker, you can invite,

Tiny moments of commitment

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that create deeper buy-in.

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Now, one of the ways that I've seen

this, and I mentioned it in a earlier

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video, was about people being sent

to the back of the room to buy these

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jars, so jars that they could put

money into, help manage their finances.

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What that sales call was about was

training people into rushing toward the

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back of the room so that they would be

in the habit of doing that later on.

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They'd already made a small commitment

to something that was part of a bigger

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picture, and so it was easier for

most to go on and say yes to further

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learning and development that was gonna

be offered throughout the program.

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So how do you create audience

commitment from the stage?

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Well, this doesn't mean making people

chant or sign contracts in the middle of

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your talk, it's about creating alignment.

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You want to ask small, relevant

questions, like, who here wants

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to lead with more confidence?

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Maybe you raise your hand up

so that you encourage other

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people to raise theirs as well.

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You can even ask, show of hands, who

here wants to lead with more confidence?

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Is anyone gonna answer no to that?

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Probably not, but here's a, here's

a little speaker trick for you.

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So as you say, who here wants

to leave with more confidence?

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You raise your hand.

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Anybody no?

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No.

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Anybody who's not gonna raise

the hand, no matter what I say.

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And you might get a laugh, but

you'll probably get compliance from

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most of the people in the audience.

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It's a small commitment.

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Encourage a physical action.

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Raise your hand if this

has ever happened to you.

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Encouraging the physical action

can make a huge difference as well.

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It creates that public commitment

or public agreement that people will

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then want to stay congruent with.

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You could get people to write

something down, like, what's one thing

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you're committing to try this week?

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Use inclusive language when

you speak, like together, we're

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stepping into whatever it is.

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And when people make small commitments

even privately, they begin seeing

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themselves as someone who takes action.

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Your job is to make the next steps

easy, consistent, and aligned.

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We want commitment in your offer

or your call to action as well.

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So if your talk leads to a program,

a download or an offer, tie it

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back to some earlier moments.

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Now, examples, this could be like if

you said to your audience, if you wrote

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down that you want to communicate more

clearly this workbook will guide you.

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Now, you already said you want

to be a more confident speaker.

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This is the next step.

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Don't pressure, but instead affirm

the identity that they have taken.

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Something like this is for speakers

like you who follow through.

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Do you see what this works by?

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This language is okay.

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It's what we could call manipulation, but

there's always gonna be manipulation and

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it's not necessarily a negative thing.

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And you may have heard me talk about

this before, if you watched other videos.

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We are always manipulating situations,

consciously and unconsciously, and really

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where it becomes negative is where we're

just doing it for our own ends rather

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than for the benefit of other people.

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Here's how we can know if

we're being ethical with this.

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Are we doing it for their

benefit or solely for us?

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Now, it's okay if you get some benefit

from helping them, but if the primary

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goal is helping others to get what

they want, you can be pretty sure

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that you are in more ethical territory

than you just grabbing loads of money

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and getting all the sales through

and getting exactly what you want.

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Here's the thing, consistency

builds trust in you too.

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So it's not just what your

audience commits to, it's also

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what you consistently show.

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This is gonna mean checking in on

things like are you aligned with

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your messaging across your platforms?

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What about your branding?

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Do you look the same in different

places where you show up?

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How do you show up on stage and off stage?

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Some people are vastly

different personalities off

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the stage than they are on it.

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I've seen this many times and it

does create a lack of congruence.

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It does create a sense of mistrust

that you know, that that person

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has maybe just done a performance

because that's not who they are.

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They have acted the part

rather than being that.

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And that might send up some red flags.

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In fact, I feel like it should send up

some red flags, some alarm bells, as

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this person might not actually be living

what they are teaching or talking about.

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And if people are not walking their talk,

you can be pretty sure that they can,

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they may be able to talk the talk and

they may be able to give an impressive

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flashy presentation, but there might

be something going on underneath now.

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Could you still get value from them?

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Yeah.

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Could you still learn from them?

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Yes.

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But you may also find that cracks

will start to appear at some point.

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I encourage you, take it as a red flag.

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It doesn't mean that

there is something wrong.

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It is an indication that there might

be, and that's perhaps something

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that you want to think about,

reflect on, investigate further.

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So how you show up on and

off stage is important.

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And I'll tell you this, the people who

I know who show up very similarly off

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stage to who they are on stage, yeah,

they might turn up the dials a bit,

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the energy gets higher, and they're

talking to a large group of people

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when they're on stage, but they're

pretty much the same person on and off.

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That's definitely a sign of congruence

and undoubtedly creates a level of trust

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that you feel like you can rely on.

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Our brains like to be able

to predict the future.

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We like predictability.

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It lightens our cognitive load,

and it also helps us to know

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who we can and can't trust now.

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Can these things be used against us?

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Can they be manipulated?

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Can they be created artificially?

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Yes, they can.

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And this is true of all

of Cialdini's principles.

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There are people who learn these

principles so that they can use them

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to get what they want, however.

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What research has often shown is that

the people who perhaps are very low

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empathy and have no issue with tricking

people or are quite happy to act

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unethically in these sorts of situations.

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They find a way to figure this stuff

out by themselves through trial and

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error of what works when you're trying

to trick people and get what you want.

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So a lot of the time they're not

actively going out and looking to learn

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from someone like Robert Cialdini.

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They are doing the trial and error method

of testing this out on people and seeing

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what works and what doesn't, and generally

finding that these principles do work.

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We are learning them from

an ethical viewpoint.

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As always, with everything I teach

here, and encourage it to be, used

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within an ethical framework, but

obviously I can't guarantee that

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because it is ultimately the end user

who determines whether it's gonna be

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used ethically or not, which is you.

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So you get to determine whether you use

these tools ethically or unethically.

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And my hope is you're

using them ethically.

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So speakers who are consistent in

branding, tone, values, and delivery.

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They become more trusted.

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They're more reliable if

you are all over the place.

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Even with things like your topic, if

you are shifting from topic to topic

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because you just want to speak, speak

about what's gonna get you the most

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money and what's popular at the time.

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It's not a great strategy for professional

speakers, and it is going to damage

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your brand and your trustability.

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So bookers will find it hard to book

you because they're not really gonna

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know who you are or what you are about.

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Now, sometimes when people

worry about their credibility.

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This is where the commitment

and consistency part can

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really come into play.

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Because if you are passionate and

committed to your topic and you

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are constantly learning more about

it and developing within that, you

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don't have to be the person with a

doctorate, and all the qualifications

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and knowledge about that, but you

have a passion and a knowledge and

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a real dedication to your topic.

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But that is gonna give you a

level of credibility in itself.

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Let's sum this up.

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Predictability creates

comfort and credibility.

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let's take a look as we do each

video at some of the unethical

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ways of using this and some of the

perhaps mistakes or misuses that

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you would hopefully want to avoid.

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Overusing commitment tactics

especially when it's too soon.

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If you are constantly raise your

hand, raise your hand, raise

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your hand with the audience,

they're gonna get fed up with it.

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There's this thing in speaking called

a yes set, and I'm thankfully, I don't

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see speakers doing it too much now, but

it really used to be that whole thing

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of training your audience to say yes.

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So it's question after question

after question, which are all the

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kinds of almost rhetorical questions.

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The only thing you can answer

to these questions is yes.

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So they do require an answer, but there's

only one answer you want people to give.

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The question of who here

wants to be more confident?

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Who here wants to be a great leader?

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Yeah.

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Who here wants to be successful?

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Is anyone really gonna say no to those?

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So these will, be used

in sequence to build on?

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Yes.

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After, yes.

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After.

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Yes.

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I personally have never found

that to be very effective.

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It does not create a yes

mindset in your audience.

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It's almost like tricking someone, reverse

psychology, like in an argument where

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you suddenly say to the other person what

they're arguing and they, they disagree.

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Ah, got you.

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But it's a trick and that's all

it is and it doesn't really work.

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So don't overuse commitment

tactics particularly, and don't

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go heavy handed with them either.

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One thing that is guaranteed to lose

trust for you is guilt tripping,

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and this can be done through reverse

psychology . Guys, I'll share with you,

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it's kind of an embarrassing story,

but I'll share it with you anyway.

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That when I was in Nashville last year,

I went to a karaoke night and one of

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the people I was with, I just wanted

to have fun and wanted to see everyone

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getting up on stage and joining in.

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And I got up and did my usual Dolly Parton

nine to five, which is my karaoke classic.

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And and I was really thrilled to be doing

that in Nashville as well of all places.

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And one of the girls in the team, I was

trying to encourage her to get up on

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stage, and then I tried using a little

bit of reverse psychology on it, saying,

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I thought you were really more of a go

get 'em kind of person stuff that, and

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she, she recognized straight what I was

doing and said, look, you're not gonna

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guilt trip me into going on the stage.

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I don't wanna do it.

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And straight away I was

like, oh my goodness, that

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is exactly what I was doing.

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And, and really it was not in any

kind of negative way, but I went and

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apologized afterwards and said, Hey,

look, I, I really didn't mean to do that.

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I just wanted to encourage you to have fun

and, maybe just went a little bit too far.

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It was cool.

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We were cool, was no big problem there,

but it was definitely a sort of, ooh.

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That's something to stay aware

of for the future of like,

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that's not a good way to be

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trying to encourage people to do

something far better to be, Hey look, is

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this something you'd really like to do?

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I'd love to see you up on the stage and

say, oh no, I don't really wanna do it.

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Or, yeah, I'd love to do

it, but I'm a be scared.

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Look, I'm here to support you.

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What can I say that's gonna

get you up on the stage?

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I think that that's much more valuable.

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Can you imagine yourself out there?

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What song would you sing?

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Yeah, you can give a lot more

encouragement, but guilt tripping.

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No, no, no.

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Stay well away from it and learn.

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Learn from my lesson, which

thankfully was in a very innocuous

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situation at least, but still I

felt the need to apologize for it.

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It's not good.

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Guilt and shame have been used to control

and manipulate people for centuries

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in various different ways in politics

and religion and all sorts of places.

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And they are negative techniques

that I don't recommend at all.

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If you are using audience participation

as a manipulation technique, that's

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also something to be aware of.

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If you're trying to lead things in a

particular way, and people are probably

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gonna, some people are gonna pick up on

that and they're really not gonna like

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it, they're gonna see that you are trying

to control an outcome in a situation

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and that it is forced manipulation.

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I see this in a lot of personal

development events and I'm not gonna

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name names here 'cause you'll know

who I'm talking about and I don't

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want people coming after me, but, the

people who really ramp up the passion

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and enthusiasm they have everyone

dancing and clapping and, high fives

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and arm pumping and all of that stuff.

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And they get so ramped up.

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It is ultimately a manipulation to get you

into a state where your emotions are so

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high that your rational mind is lowered.

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When we are in a high emotional

state, our intelligence goes down.

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Unfortunately, it just is less relevant.

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We're very much in the moment,

we're in the experience.

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We feel almost high on the experience

and we're not really thinking about it.

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We just go on instincts.

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We go on, Hey, I feel good right

now, and I want to keep feeling good.

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So we can end up making commitments and

making agreements, is a great time to

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get someone to commit to buying something

when they're on an emotional high.

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But is it an ethical time to get

people to buy some things again, if

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your result that you want is for them

to buy and for you to get them money.

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That's what you're gonna do.

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You're gonna use this.

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But if you are somewhat more ethical

and you think, sure, people are gonna

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make emotional decisions for sure, but

I don't wanna be manipulating their

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emotions purely to get them to do that.

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I want them to make a decision

with their heart and with

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their head as best they can.

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I think that's a better way to go forward.

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So yes.

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We do make our decisions emotionally,

generally, but that doesn't mean we

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should be using things like music and

dance and energy from other people, and

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peer pressure to a degree to create that.

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So forcing now can perhaps even force

consistency by making people feel trapped.

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Like they have to make that decision.

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Can almost, again, kind of using those

tricks, word tricks to manipulate

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people to, if this, then that.

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And if someone's been very clever

about this and put it together,

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they'll have people committing to

something earlier on and say, all

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right, well you committed to all of

this, and now the next step is this.

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Then they're gonna feel trapped

and that they have to do it.

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That's not really where

you want 'em to be.

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You want 'em to want to do it as well.

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Not that they're gonna feel that, oh,

well I guess I have to do that now

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because yeah, I said that about myself.

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Some.

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That's a part of it, but you

still want that to be ethical.

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One of the things that Cialdini

talked about in the book was getting

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people to put, signs on their lawns

I think it was from a political

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event something along those lines.

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Initially, a small gesture would be asked

for a small token or an easy commitment,

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like, would you put this flag up in your

window or would you donate 50 cents?

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Or whatever it is, and someone's

gonna easily, oh yeah, okay.

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That's easy to agree to.

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Once they've done that, if those

people then contacted them out

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later on and asked 'em to agree to

something bigger, they generally would.

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Not a hundred percent,

but generally they would.

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And so that's the principle at

work that once people make a small

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commitment, they're likely to go

on and make a bigger commitment.

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And I encourage you to use that and

to use it in ethical ways with your

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audience . Ultimately, this particular

tool is very open to unethical use.

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I probably have seen it used

more unethically than ethically.

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That should tell you something about it.

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I do feel it's such a powerful tool

that we should be using it ethically.

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So I encourage you to do that.

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Support people's alignment, not shame.

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We want people to feel aligned

and that they're making the

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right decision for them.

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We want to encourage

growth, but not pressure.

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We don't wanna put pressure on people.

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We want them to want it, and

through doing that, we're gonna

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build trust rather than control.

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As we think about this and think about

how you might be wanting to use some of

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this in your own speaking, especially if

you are doing things like workshops or

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if you're selling from the stage and you

particularly want people to take action on

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what you are teaching and talking about.

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Commitment and consistency is

about more than persuasion.

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It's really about helping people

to become who they want to be, and

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that then helps you to be a speaker

that they trust a trusted guide.

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So if you want to be

remembered, be consistent.

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You wanna be booked.

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Again, help audiences to

commit to what they want.

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And if you've got value from this

episode, well subscribe, share it

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with a fellow speaker, and check the

description for more influence resources.

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But until the next episode in this series

before we move on to some other areas.

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Stay present, stay consistent,

and stay influential.