How to be a mediocre podcast guest

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What is it that makes people bland and boring as podcast guests,

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and what could you do about it?

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This is Podfluence, the show that helps you grow your influence

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and impact with podcasts.

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My name is John Ball and my mission is to help you, the self-employed

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business coach, to grow your influence and income so that you can have a

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continually thriving coaching business.

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Also, if you are a service-based solopreneur or a speaker,

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chances are that this content will be very helpful to you too.

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If you're going on podcasts as a strategy to grow your business, but all

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you're really saying is the same kind of stuff that other people are saying

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and delivering it in the same kind of way, you don't really have a hope

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of standing out and you're probably wasting your time for the most part.

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Would you want to listen to a podcast where the guests said nothing

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particularly new and showed no real passion for their specialty.

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If normal is boring, why are so many people trying so hard to be normal?

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If you have your device in your hand right now, do me a solid and click the

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updates of Podfluence as they drop.

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But now popping your EarPods and let's get started on this episode of Pod Fluence.

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Do you think people remember you after seeing you or hearing you

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on a podcast interview or reading some of your online content?

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Well, they might if you stand out in some way, but most people

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don't, so most people won't.

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In this episode, I want to expand on one of the key elements that came up in my

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conversation recently with Neil Veglio,

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share some of my own thoughts that there wasn't really time

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to get into during that episode.

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Now, I don't know if you've noticed this, but there seems to be a lot of bland

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and generic content getting pumped out these days, and seemingly also a lot of

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equally bland and generic people doing it.

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Everyone is vying for attention online these days, and the people who get it

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are generally grabbing that attention.

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Unfortunately, that's often because many of them are deeply

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unpleasant, people sharing highly offensive and extreme opinions.

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I only have to look at what's trending on Twitter to regularly see the usual

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suspects who are sharing horrible things or doing horrible things online.

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Many of the names that regularly trend, you know, are trending with something

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awful before you even take a look.

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The polemicists and the extrem.

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Do seem to have taken a great deal of our attention online and we seem

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to love them and hate them for it.

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At the same time, you only have to look at all the attention a certain form of

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president still gets in the press to see the many ways in which we have become

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addicted to outrage and sensationalism.

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And whilst it may be that the majority of people in reality are far more moderate

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in their views, it doesn't always appear that way on social media because far

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too many people are afraid to speak.

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You could be forgiven for thinking that you need to become a shameless grifting

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void of morality with extreme or highly controversial views in order to get any

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attention and to make any money online.

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But I don't think that that's the case.

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I really think it's more an issue of people generally holding themselves

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back and being a little too bland.

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Perhaps because they see what happens when people do speak up online and

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they don't want to get piled on.

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Maybe it is partly as a reaction or response to the contrarians online,

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but also partly because people generally seem to lack the passion and

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conviction of their beliefs and values.

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I remember when I was first being trained as a trainer with Harv

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Eker, it was made very clear to me by Harv and the team that there was

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no room for being bland or boring.

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Now, I've lost count of the amount of times I heard Harv say normal is boring.

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It seems that most people want to be seen as normal and as a result at doing

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a very poor job of becoming memorable.

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Being memorable requires standing out, and most people just don't want to do that.

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So if you want to be a mediocre podcast guest, then here's what you need to do.

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Spend all of your time obsessing about what people think of you.

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Make it all about you suppress all your own values and core beliefs so

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that you can fit in with what the majority thinks and finds acceptable.

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Because the last thing you want is to have someone openly disagreeing with you.

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Refuse to get excited or enthusiastic about anything at

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all, and remain as serious and professional as you can at all times.

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Do no research or preparation for any of the shows you're going to be

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on because you are the star, right?

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And once you've delivered your bit, just forget about it.

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Do nothing else.

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Yeah.

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If you're happy being mediocre and forgettable, great.

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Good for you.

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You'll likely still find some following and tribe out there,

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but you'll never really stand out.

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becoming more memorable requires becoming more.

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You know that thing that Simon Cowell often says to

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people on those talent shows?

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That doesn't always seem to make sense, like, be you, but be more you.

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That's not about becoming some arrogant, diva asshole.

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It's about turning up the dials on your personal energy.

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People will often tell you it is about being more authentic, but most people

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in their authentic day-to-day lives are kind of dull and not especially exciting.

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If you're being authentic to your true personality by how you are most of the

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time, that's really not going to cut it.

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Be authentic to your values, to your core beliefs, and if you are not clear on what

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they are, you've got some work to do, but that's why people like myself are out

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here to help you with that kind of thing.

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Now, one of the reasons why I think Simon Cowell has become so popular

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over the years is that he shares his genuine thoughts on things, or at

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least that's what he appears to do.

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Most of the other judges don't want to say anything that's not positive

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or might get someone to potentially rethink their catastrophic decision to

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embark on a professional singing career.

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Simon Cowell is often thought of as being Mr Mean, but people love it

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because he's not trying to pander to the audience or say the right thing.

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He seems to want to give feedback that he believes the person needs to hear.

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I've noticed this in most feedback situations that I see that people

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are usually scared or unwilling to give any feedback that is anything

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less than positive and might not be what the person wants to hear because

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you don't wanna trigger people.

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You don't want people getting upset or offended.

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This is way too common in coaching as well.

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Far too many coaches want to be everyone's friend and don't want to upset anyone

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and end up being as my new friend Neil Veglio said in our recent chat, like bland

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cake, a vanilla sponge with no icing.

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Sometimes people need to hear some harsh truth because most people are not

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prepared to be the one who tells them.

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So we don't always get to hear it.

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In general in society, we tend to be more drawn to comforting

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fantasies than harsh realities.

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The trouble is we end up being weaker for it.

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We lose our mental resilience if we only ever hear good things about ourselves and

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we won't ever get any negative feedback.

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We end up struggling to say no to people for fear of what they're going

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to think about us, and we end up losing any healthy boundaries that we should

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have because we're too busy contorting ourselves to being liked by everyone.

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In being a people pleaser, we put our confidence in the wisdom of

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the crowd instead of ourselves.

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We lack true passion and conviction because we have to temper our

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true thoughts and feelings through the filter of public perception.

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You don't need to get loud and preachy, save that for the churches,

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but you do need to find your own passion and enthusiasm for your

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thing and let it shine through you in the way that fits best for you.

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How do you expect to effectively serve your clients or audience if you only

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ever tell them what they want to hear instead of what they need to hear?

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You don't need to be an asshole about it.

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In fact, it's better that you are not, but you do sometimes need to get people

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to swallow the bitter pill, which as Mary Poppins reminds us, goes down

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much better with a spoon full of sugar.

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The best coaches I know do tough love very well, and it's something

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more of us could benefit from doing.

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I recommend keeping in mind a bit of Totek wisdom from Don Miguel

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Ruiz's book, the Four Agreements to Be Impeccable With Your Word.

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So don't speak to be unkind or to rip someone to shreds.

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Find acceptable ways to share or frame your feedback, making sure

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that it is coming from a place of positive intent for the recipient.

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It may also help to keep the wisdom of Socrates in mind as you.

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Well then, said Socrates, turning on his heel, if what you want to

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say is neither true, nor good, nor kind, nor useful or necessary,

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please don't say anything at all.

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I believe we can all do better when it comes to helping people

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get what they want and get to where they really want to get to.

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Being provocative can be good and healthy when it's done in the right

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way, with the right intention.

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We all need challenges in order to grow and transcend the status quo.

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If our quest is to be better coaches, better leaders, better teachers, better

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podcast guests, we must be willing to be disliked sometimes by some people.

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But we're not aiming to be disliked by everyone.

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every magnet both attracts and repels.

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So be more magnetic by both attracting those who vibe with your values and core

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beliefs and repelling those who don't.

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They're not for you anyway.

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It will probably feel a little bit scary at first, but I promise you this,

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it will be transformative for both you and for your clients and audience.

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And one thing you'll notice is that you'll very quickly stop being bland.

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Now, I don't know about you, but I've worked with many coaches over

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the years, and I've always found it to be true that the ones who are

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nice and gentle and fluffy, they do very little to help me grow.

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The ones who can deliver tough love in a way that shows that they genuinely

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care and want to challenge you to be your highest potential self are the

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ones with whom I personally have always.

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I know there are gonna be coaches who disagree with me

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here, and I'm good with that.

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In fact, I welcome anyone who does disagree to come and tell

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me why you think I'm wrong.

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Because I like to be challenged.

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I don't think I'm so right that I'm not willing to hear other people's

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opinions and consider them, and if I end up figuring out that

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I'm wrong, I'm going to change my opinion based on that new information

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because that's how it should work.

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We should not be afraid to be challenged on our opinions or to change our

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minds if we end up being wrong.

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Now, that's pretty much it for this week, but the one thing I'll close

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on is that if you don't have passion, confidence, and conviction in the

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things that you're saying and doing and how you deliver all of that, you're

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never gonna come across effectively to the people who you want to serve.

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So it's essential that you start turning up your energy and enthusiasm

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for the things that you share with your audience and with your clients.

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You'll often hear it said that the best way to put someone into an emotional

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state is to be in that state yourself.

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Well, if you want to inspire and motivate people, you have to show up

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being inspired and motivated yourself.

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That's it for this week's episode.

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Next week I'm gonna be speaking with really someone who's quite amazing.

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I was thoroughly impressed, in fact, delighted in the conversation

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that we ended up having.

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If you've ever heard of Webinar Jam or the $100 MBA podcast with Omar Zenhom, you

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might have come across my guest next week.

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Her name is Nicole Baldinu.

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She's the partner of Omar Zenum, and she has been involved in creating Webinar

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Jam and the $100 MBA and much more.

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We had an amazing conversation, which I admit I was woefully under-prepared for.

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Thankfully, Nicole is an amazing person and very gracious, and we still ended up

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having a very valuable conversation, which I know you are not going to want to miss.

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Make sure you subscribe to the show in whichever way you need to do that on

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whatever platform you are listening on, and wherever you are, whatever you're

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doing, have an amazing rest of your day.